Butterfly
by sarahqq
Summary: He doesn't notice me much, but when he does he stares. He tells me I'm pretty even when I'm not. He kisses me till morning even when I don't want him to. He calls me "cherry" because he thinks my lips are the exact same shade, but calls her "baby" because she's his sweetheart. But every single time I break and cry - he whispers, "Fly away, butterfly." Dark themes but NOT graphic
1. Prologue

PROLOGUE

* * *

"Bella."

He sounds like a pompous French-speaking asshole, so I don't answer.

"Bella."

Yeah, pompous, all right, so I still don't answer.

"Mademoiselle Cherry."

I finally snap my book shut. "What?"

He scowls and drops the goofy French charade. "Why the fuck are you getting mad at me?"

"I'm not mad, you idiot. I'm trying to do my homework, for once."

I sound more annoyed that I really am, but he too should be busy studying whatever he has been studying. I notice the French textbook on his lap.

Of course.

I glare as he lights yet another cigarette. He closes his eyes and hums, and I hate that he's just opened his fourth pack.

It's only three in the afternoon.

Whatever.

I turn my back on him and return to the book, but I have no idea what Charles Dickens is saying. The guy doesn't know how to write in short sentences.

Then I notice that Ed is completely _out_ of sentences.

"Spit it out if you want to say something," I mumble.

Brushing the hair off my shoulder, he coos my name in my ear and sneaks his hands onto my waist. His hands go up and down, driving me crazy, and his voice has my attention; I can tell he's trying to flip me back over to him, but I'm not going without a fight.

Sometimes, he's the girl in this fucked up relationship.

I smack him hard on the chest when he blows smoke at my face. I get into a fit of coughs, twisting and writhing as I try to get under the bed sheets for clean air.

He cackles, throwing his head back and bouncing his shoulders, when I kick him on the stomach.

"Sorry, baby," he mumbles, snorting and smiling, as he begins to kiss – no, chew – on my lips.

"Disgusting." I push him away again. "Enough touching me already. Don't you get tired?"

"Nope."

"You're the lamest senior in our school. Sucks that I'm the only one who knows that."

"Well, sorry for being so lame, but at least I'm not the school resident whore. Sucks that people still have a smidgen of respect for you and think only half the rumors are true… when they all are."

That stings, but I don't let it show.

He taps his cigarette on the rim of my coffee mug, and when I give him a look, he smirks.

It gets quiet, but only for a second because he suddenly whines again.

"Will you shut up already?" I say. "What do you want?"

He smiles widely.

I sigh but smile back because his face gets disgustingly handsome when he does that.

"You wanna go to prom with me?"

My smile diminishes as I stick up a middle finger.

"Don't give me that!" he laughs. "I'm serious."

"You're serious, all right. I'm just as serious, then."

"I wanna take you, baby." He hugs my waist and kisses my neck, all over. "I want to have you for the rest of that night."

"Are you high?" I'm pretty aghast. "You have a girlfriend, hello?"

"And you don't? Have a boyfriend, I mean?" He pauses. "By the way, I use the term boyfriend very loosely."

I ignore the second half of his answer. "More reason not to go."

"I love how you're so stubborn."

He loves everything about me, but never me. Not that anyone else does, anyway – loves me, that is.

"Ed." I frown. "I'm starving."

He blinks. "Yeah, same."

"Wanna order something?"

"Pizza?" He prattles off. "Chinese? Pho?"

"Chinese!"

"Gotcha."

"Ed?"

"Oui?"

"You're paying."

"Like you ever pay." He says that, but he's harmless. As he reaches over the nightstand for his phone, he checks the time. "Shit."

I know that face.

"Maggie's probably waiting." He doesn't even look at me, or give a second thought, as he slides right off my bed and lands on his feet. Jerk. "Where's my watch?"

I throw him his ridiculously expensive accessory.

Again, in all seriousness, he's the girl.

Even as I think this, though, I watch with slumped shoulders as he paces around my room. I try to press down the disappointment as he dresses up.

Sighing, I slant to the side and stare at the perfect curve of his ass. "You and your preppy clothes. Aw, Mr. Fashionista."

"You don't get to talk. You crossdress."

I mock gasp. "I do not!"

He snickers and doesn't look at me again as he slips out the door.

I hear his rushed footsteps down the stairs. Then I hear his sedan beep.

Suddenly I am flicking open my bedroom window and shouting his name.

He looks up, eyebrows rising.

The winds are chilly, and I am naked head to toe, but I don't give a crap.

"I want to go to prom!" I shout at the top of my lungs.

"With me?"

I deadpan. "No, with Benji."

A slow grin.

"You're going to break up with her?"

"Maggie? Sure."

"Okay, then, ask me again when you do."

Although he doesn't nod, I know he's nodding.

Then he's staring at my tits. "Put some clothes on!"

Instead, I pop my chest out and play with my nipples.

He's smirking.

The car pulls out the driveway, and I try to hold my tongue but I can't.

"Maggie's a bitch!" I yell, and I laugh when I see his middle finger poking out through his window.

"I'll call you later!" he shouts.

"You better!" I am breathless by the time his car turns into a dot.

I order Chinese all alone and stuff my mouth.

He forgets to call.

Not that he ever remembers to.

No big surprise there.

* * *

**A/N:** Hi, everyone! Now that I realize that my other fic, All We Are, will come to a close in the next few months, I decided to get a head start on this new fic. Here, we still have high school, drama, Bella, and Edward, but I'm sure you already noticed that this is a bit different from AWA.

Tell me what you think!

Sarah


	2. Chapter 1

ONE

* * *

"One day, Bella, you're going to have a hell of a lot to pay for that sick habit."

"What?" I hungrily grab for the strip of bacon and nibble. "I just woke up."

Jasper rolls his eyes. He stares at my chest, though, and scoffs.

I love annoying him, so I snap my bra strap obnoxiously loud.

He scoffs again.

"Love you too, brother," I hum.

"Your brother's right, sweetie. You have to stop roaming around the house in just your lingerie. You're turning seventeen in a week."

"Two weeks," I correct my dad. I shrug. "Plus it's a habit."

My dad, Charlie, kisses the top of my head on his way to the coffeemaker, and I smile fondly at his back.

Charlie's dressed to a tee today, not that he ever isn't.

"You look really hot today, daddy."

"Thanks, sweetie." He chuckles and zips past me.

"How long will you be gone this time?" I reach for Jasper's grapes. He scowls, but I stick my tongue out.

"Thirty days, about."

Thirty days? "But that means you're going to miss my birthday."

"Sorry, Bella. Gotta bring the bacon home."

"We _have _bacon." With disdain, I dangle the strip in between my fingers.

Charlie laughs. "You know what I mean."

I do, but I don't. Dad can retire right this moment, and he, mom, Jasper, and I can still live frivolously for the rest of our lives if we wanted.

"So what does my little girl want for her birthday? Anything you want, sweetie."

I'm not in the mood to steal Jasper's food anymore.

"I don't know," I mumble. "A new car?"

Charlie gives me a handsome smile. "Done."

I smile back, but it's half the size of his.

When he gets in the car, I shout through the kitchen window and tell him to drive safely.

"It's a long drive to New York," I explain. "And get some sleep while you're working, okay? Don't overdo it!"

"Wall Street never sleeps, Bella."

I smirk and wave goodbye.

Then I sigh aloud, and Jasper hears me.

"Where's mom?" I ask softly. "School already?"

"Yep. She commuted early, rehearsing the beginning choir and shit."

"Oh."

"Mm."

Our house – way too big for two teenagers – is horribly quiet.

Jasper's eyes meet mine for a second before flickering away.

* * *

Jasper literally crawls out my car as soon as I park.

He's dry-heaving and everything, with his hand on the door, as soon as his feet touch ground again.

I'm offended.

"How did you get your damn permit?" he gasps.

"By passing the exams."

Jasper is still gasping, clutching his chest. "My life could have ended two minutes ago."

"Oh, shut up."

But inside, I _am_ kind of sorry because Jasper's face is actually pretty green.

"Let's go," I say anyway. "I don't want to be late for Bio."

"Your obsession for Mr. Hyde is crazy scary."

I look to the side in surprise.

Edward Cullen, my brother's best friend since birth, stands behind me with an amused expression on his face.

"It's not an obsession," I tell him. "It's a crush."

"Yeah, a creepy one at that." Before I can respond, Ed looks away and raises a perfect eyebrow at my brother. Damn. "And you look just peachy this fine morning."

"Speak for yourself." Jasper shakes his head, groaning. "You have bags under your eyes."

Ed lazily glances down at me, giving me a look and communicating his annoyance with his eyes.

I shrug.

I guess the bags under his eyes have everything to do with his dad, the Democrat Virginian senator running for reelection this year. The Election Day is only in two months, and I can only imagine the stress. I actually feel a little bad for him.

I take in his profile, and yeah, seeing him this close, I notice he really does have bags. He's still pretty fucking good-looking though, and I've always loved the silver ear stud on his left ear. He pulls it off wonderfully.

But my respect and sympathy for him disappear as soon as the first bell rings and he smacks my ass.

I gasp and glare. Thank God Jasper didn't see that. "What was that for?"

He smirks and searches my eyes. "You're just too cute staring at me like that."

"Like _what_?"

"Like _that._"

I don't get it, but he does. He laughs quietly and shakes his head before heading off to his class without me.

"You're the creep," I yell.

He waves a hand over his shoulder.

* * *

Mr. Hyde, or Pete as I get to call him, is the kind of teacher everyone adores, boys and girls alike.

First off, he's a great teacher and knows what he's talking about. He cracks jokes that high school teenagers actually laugh to, and he makes Biology interesting.

Maybe it's the age factor, not to mention his amazing credentials. During the two years he's been in this school, he's probably had every single female student in his classes harbor a crush on him at one point.

And he _might _be something to look at, and again, incredibly young for a prestigious private school teacher.

People go to him for advice, not the school counselors.

I'm one of those people, and so Pete knows _everything _about me.

Everything.

Every secret.

Just everything.

"How are you this morning, Bella?" he asks me, checking my name off his clipboard.

He raises his eyebrows from the end of the classroom, and all the girls in my class turn to stare at me. Yeah, they don't like that he only asks _me _that question during roll call.

"I'm doing well," I say brightly.

He looks back down, his brown hair flopping over his forehead, but I can still see his mouth: smirking.

"Good," he says before calling out the next name on the list.

My God, at this rate, my heart is going to punch itself out my ribs.

* * *

"I'm going to talk dirty now, but please don't tell your parents about this, okay?"

Girls sit up taller and exchange demure looks.

I, on the other hand, try not to look too interested, but inside, I'm totally interested.

Pete steps away from the smartboard, on which is the diagram of human anatomy.

"So there are colonies and colonies of bacteria in a woman's vagina, where it's really warm and wet – maybe slightly acidic, but that's beside the point." He shushes the snickering boys. "Believe it or not, that's perfectly normal. So you ladies, when you take the wrong pills, you're cleansing yourself of those bacteria, and that's not always the good thing, is it?"

All girls, both virgins and sluts, avidly shake their heads side to side. Some are squirming and squeezing their thighs.

"And why is it bad, Bella?"

And I'm kind of the teacher's pet. "Because you're getting rid of the good bacteria too."

"Exactly." His million dollar smile. "Okay, so that's it for the dirty talking…"

The class teases and complains, but Pete adamantly moves on to the next topic. Not without a good, solid smile, though.

But yeah, Pete makes jokes like that. I love him.

Then something else comes up, and I'm totally lost until he opens his mouth again.

"And girls have more holes – anatomically –" Pete gives everyone a friendly smile, "you did know that, right, boys?"

The boys frown, eyes going up as if they are counting them in their heads.

I nudge my tablemate, Angela, on the rib, and when I have her attention, I stealthily point at all my "holes," from face to vagina.

She giggles, and I do too.

And Pete looks at me. He's smiling.

I never blush but am pretty darn close now, because I seriously hope he didn't see me counting my… holes.

Well. God, he has the cutest dimples.

* * *

"Yes, Lauren?" Pete turns the smartboard back on, the diagram of the human heart flashing on the screen again, and sighs. "But before you ask your question, may I ask if it actually pertains to what we just went over?"

"Of course!" she promises, biting her lip.

Unconvinced, I stare at her; she _is _well known for asking him the most random questions. Well, I love it, because she asks the things I – or the other girls – would never be brave enough to ask.

His love life, for instance.

"I'm just really curious about something…"

"Of course you are." Pete hides a smile and crosses his arms. "Go ahead."

Lauren pokes Jessica's side, and they chortle to themselves.

And it's Jessica who speaks up. "Okay, so Lauren wants to know why your heart starts beating really fast when you see someone you like."

The boys scowl and make ugly faces, but the girls are giggling and agreeing on something in whispers.

I sit up a little taller, just because.

"That's actually a really good question." He waits momentarily for the class to quiet down. "How should I explain this? Well, it's the hormones being activated; so you _can _say that it's a sort of mechanism that warns the brain, as your heart pumps out the blood. Like, for example, the body's telling the brain, 'Wake up! Your crush is around! Concentrate! Anticipate!' Does that make sense? It's literally a self-alert sort of thing."

I don't miss how Pete's eyes linger on me for a second longer than usual as he answers his question, and suddenly my heart's telling my brain to wake up all over again.

* * *

Just by the volume of the applause directed at Edward, I can tell he's going to get it. Seriously – Tyler Crowley has nothing on him. Edward Cullen is the son of a darn senator, for crying out loud.

The Student Council sponsor takes over the floor, microphone in hand, when she addresses him.

"So, Edward, you're running for school President…"

People cheer so loudly that my ears hurt.

I smirk when Edward smirks – that smug bastard.

"I think it's safe to assume that your participation in certain extracurriculars, including Model UN and Debate, is influenced by your father. So here's a fun question: do you by any chance aspire to become the President of our country?" the commentator finishes.

Yeah, everyone goes pretty wild.

But I don't blame them.

Ed's pretty cool, I guess.

He can't throw a ball to save his life, but that's okay, because he has other, much more admirable merits.

Like, he's got the best singing voice; he's the student director of our school's show choir. He was already the student body president last year, and now also the editor of the school paper and the Secretary General of our school's Model UN program. And it's funny because you'd think that's just about it for him – the smarts – but he's always voted best dressed for his impeccable style. Rumor has it that he's aiming for Princeton or Yale after high school, and that he's majoring in something related to politics – no surprise there.

Edward is one of those guys – really smart, fucking hot, and as cool as a cucumber. That guy is born to be a politician.

His family and my family are well-acquainted. While my dad mostly mingles in the New York financial district, he and Senator Cullen get along pretty well. It's no surprise that Jasper and Edward are best friends as well.

Then sometimes, there are moments when I wonder if I find Edward as attractive as my friends do.

Jessica whispers in my ear, "Okay, does he have the sexiest grey eyes or what? I'd tap that. For real."

Hmm.

Sure, Edward Cullen is hot and all, but…

"I don't know… He's like a brother to me," I say, and it's true.

Edward suddenly winks in my direction, and although I'm in the mix of sea of people, I know it's for me.

I wink back.

But whether he's brother figure or not, I like flirting with him.

And I think he likes flirting with me too.

* * *

"Mom's going to be home late," I yell as I pull on my shorts and hop down the stairs. "Faculty meeting and some shit –"

I stop dead on my tracks as I see Edward on the couches. He's just flipped on the television.

"You…" I trail off awkwardly, "are uninvited. How did you get in? And where the heck's Jasper?"

"He's with Benji. They'll be here in a few."

I frown. "Dicks over chicks today?"

He laughs through his nose. "What?"

"Ditching your girlfriend?" I clarify.

"Who? Maggie?" He buzzes his lips. "Not my girlfriend anymore. We're so done."

"Uh huh." I say that because Ed and Maggie make _that _couple in high school – the one that breaks up during lunch and makes up by the end of the school.

"Whatever you say, Bella," he teases, all cooing and flirty.

I hear the front door crack open, followed by more voices.

The next thing I see is my brother, hissing and cussing, as he frantically locks himself in the restroom.

"What's up with him?" I laugh.

Benji, the one who completes the Three Musketeers along with Edward and Jasper, shakes his head in shame. "Long story." Then he nods. "Cute shirt."

I flip around and flash the words "Get Off My Dick" on my back. "Talking about this?"

"Yes, that."

"Thanks…" I snort. "I wear it only when my parents aren't around."

"I suppose."

Benji's now very conspicuously checking me out, and I'm getting a tad uncomfortable.

After all, just because he's stuck his dick in me once doesn't mean I'm going to give him the opportunity again.

I give him a look, communicating a silent, "If you try to undress me with your eyes again, I'm going to tell Jasper that you fucked his little sister two months ago."

We hear the distant flush of the toilet, and Benji gets it, I think.

Good.

* * *

"Hey, Bella! We're heading out for dinner! Do you want to come?"

I rise from my bed and pop my head out the door. "What? I missed it."

"Ed, Benji, and I are heading out for dinner. Do you want to come?" Jasper says again, voice louder and echoing from downstairs. "Or do you want me to bring some take-out for you?"

"Where are you going?"

"We're grabbing some club sandwiches."

"Eh, I'll just stay. And get me whatever – anything but the veggie one."

"Sure thing."

I'm about to close the bedroom door again when Edward's voice floats upstairs: "Don't open the doors to strangers."

I roll my eyes and speak louder. "Well, I think the strangers will make it into the house just fine without me anyway. Yes, I'm talking to you, Edward!"

"Okay, okay, I love you more," Edward teases.

"Aaaand that's enough," Jasper grumbles.

Just before they leave and the house falls silent, I hear my brother say, "Damn it, Edward, do you have to talk to her like that in front of me?"

I wonder about that too sometimes.

* * *

I'm drying my wet hair with a towel when my fingernail gets caught in it.

"Oh, this is just great," I say to myself sarcastically, because for a while now, I have been growing out my nails to get them painted.

I angrily chew on the chipped nail, trying to tear off the ripped bit, but when I pull on my underwear, the damn crevice gets stuck in the cloth this time.

Groaning, I slip out my bedroom and head all the way down to my parents' in search of a nail clipper.

I'm sulking by the time I have my nails trimmed. So much for wanting to paint my nails in pretty emerald-green.

"You're still here?" I say confusedly when I see Edward by the bottom of the stairs.

He's reaching for his backpack when he looks up. He stares.

From the second floor, I look down at him and arch a brow. "You left your stuff?"

Then he shrugs, nonchalant, and heaves his bag over him. I also shrug and turn away, but he stops me.

"Yeah?"

"Can you check Jasper's room and see if my phone's there?"

I rush down the other hallway, and speak again only after I circle the room.

"I don't see it," I trail off. "Wait, found it!"

As I find my way back to the stairs, I yell, "Hey, by the way, can you tell Jasper that I changed my mind? I want the meatballs in my sandwich."

"Sure."

"Thanks." I bend over the rails and drop the phone to him. "Here, catch."

But Edward can't catch. Thing is, he doesn't even bother to try, and lets his iPhone flop onto the floor beside him.

It's good that he's filthy rich, because this entire house is made of marbled flooring…

The phone makes a resounding crack as it hits, and I raise an eyebrow. It would be a miracle if the screen weren't broken.

"You know, Edward, you have everything _but_ hand-eye coordination," I say with a smile and secretly look him up and down. I really do like his pierced ear, combat boots, and the snug leather jacket. "If you were semi-athletic, I would totally date you."

He smirks. "Your brother wouldn't allow it."

"Really," I say slowly.

"Oh, yeah."

I shrug, half convinced.

"Bella."

"What's up?"

"I would say the same thing about you too. If only you had decent clothes."

I scowl. "What's wrong with my clothes?"

His eyes widen for a second before crinkling into a cute eye-smile. He's laughing to himself now.

"Okay, fine, at least you're pretty."

I grin wider. "You think I'm pretty?"

His eyes are so intense that they're stabbing at me, and I once again think to myself that he's going to make one hell of a politician one day.

"Yeah, a pretty girl with a questionable sense of style."

I stick my tongue out.

He reaches for the front door. "You look great in pink."

Pink?

In a moment of horror, I slide my gaze down to my body. I feel the urge to palm my face.

"Thanks…" I trail off. I drop my head. "It's a habit. Sorry."

"I won't tell Jasper if you don't."

I fight the urge to smile. "Won't tell what? The fact that you caught his baby sister in just her underwear, or the fact that you were very obviously flirting with her?"

"Both." His face breaks into a hot boy grin. "By the way, that same baby sister was flirting back, if you know what I mean. Thanks for the peep show."

And the door shuts.

I want to beat my head against the wall.

I suddenly wish I'd chosen cuter underwear, just because.

And Jasper's a fucking good fortuneteller.

* * *

**A/N:** So as you can see, I'm laying out the groundwork. Meet Bella, Edward, Jasper, Pete, and Benjamin! By the way, if any of you are AWA readers, I want to let you know that the next chapter update is going to be delayed… This week wasn't a good week for me – pretty horrible, actually – and I really can't find the energy in me to write anything. This first chapter of Butterfly was written some time ago, so I decided to update this instead. Sorry and thank you. I will update soon; I promise.

So let me know what you think of the hot, geeky senator's son!

Sarah


	3. Chapter 2

TWO

* * *

Mom looks perfect in her red slip dress, and I quietly knock on the opened bedroom door.

She hates it when I come in without knocking.

And she looks up just as she finishes glossing her lips.

She quickly scans me head to toe, and I wonder, every time, if she does that consciously.

"Hey, mom," I say quietly. I'm always careful around her. "Can I borrow your lace blouse?"

"In the closet." She gets her hair in the most elegant French twist with ease, and tweaks her body from side to side to check her body in the mirror. She likes what she sees.

"It's for an interview." I make sure I don't ruffle any other clothes as I try to find the white lace. "For National Honor Society. If I get through this, I'm inducted."

"That's nice, honey," she says absentmindedly. Mom picks up her teacher binder for school and starts toward the hall.

A minute later, I find her in the kitchen with Jasper. Mom kisses his cheek in good morning and pats his butt, and my brother is blushing and telling her that he's too old for that.

She laughs and tells him she loves him.

But then she looks at me, and the look of love disappears. "Wear that blouse clean, Bella. I'm going to have to need it tomorrow." She smiles up at Jasper. "I'll see you at school."

The front door clicks close.

Jasper throws me an apple, and I catch.

"Want some cereal?" he asks.

I bite into the fruit and turn away. "I'm not hungry."

* * *

I'm daddy's girl, and Jasper's mommy's boy.

It was so bad when we were younger, and I used to think the only reason Jasper hung out with Ed was because mom was – and still is, by the way – completely, sickeningly mesmerized by the charisma the Senator's son exuded. I could totally see her doing that – telling Jasper to keep the Cullen boy close.

Now? It's still a possibility; Ed's the student director of the school's show choir, and mom's the teacher and conductor of said choir. Ed is a fantastic singer, but I think it's mom's bias toward him that worked in his favor in her choosing the director.

And I remember in middle school – when Ed and I were actually similar height because he hadn't yet hit his growth spurt – when she tried to get us to date each other, hoping that we'd one day end up married.

Yeah, it was that bad. I was mommy's girl, once upon a time, and she used to expect a lot from me as she expects a lot from Jasper today.

But then things fell apart for the real bad when I hit puberty and turned fourteen.

"Mom's going to be late again," Jasper tells me as he pulls the belt through the loop. "She told you, right?"

"No, but I'm not surprised."

"Wait, she _didn't_ tell you?"

"No. Really, Jasper?"

My brother studies me, knowing.

I study him back.

I don't understand, sometimes.

True, Jasper and I are very different. We're both pretty tall, but that's about it; we don't share any other similar physical characteristic.

He's dirty blond and bright blue eyes and naturally sun-kissed skin, while I'm black-haired and pale eyes and equally pale skin.

I have a lot of Charlie, while Jasper has a lot of Renee, my mom.

Well. Maybe that's why she doesn't like me and likes him instead.

It wasn't always like that, though.

"What are you thinking?"

I look away from Jasper. "Nothing."

* * *

I see Edward messing with his tie when I park in my usual spot.

I don't know how he does it, but he pulls off that snug pink dress shirt so nicely; I can't help but notice.

I think he feels my stare because one second later he's staring back.

He kind of leans back on the hood of his car, propping his leg up, and holds up a hand in hi.

I walk out.

"Hi, cutie," he says loudly to catch my attention.

I smile lazily, maybe a bit funnily. "Hi yourself."

"No pink lingerie today?"

I grin. "Nah, it's blue. Wanna take a peek?"

He smiles back with his eyes and goes back to fixing his tie.

"You okay?" he asks.

He kind of mumbles the words, and he's not looking at me so for a moment I'm confused.

Then he stares again.

He does that a lot.

Yeah, I stare back.

He throws his hands in the air. "All right, sorry for asking."

I look around. He and I are one of the first ones to arrive, and I see incoming cars.

"I like that shirt on you," I tell him.

He looks up and smirks. "I know."

"Smug bastard." I pause. "Why are you dressed up?"

He smacks his lips. "I have a hot date after school."

"Hot date?" His tie is crooked. I curl in a finger and tell him to get close. He does without a fight. "Who is she?"

He doesn't answer right away. I adjust the silk and look up.

He's searching my eyes slowly, and he's suddenly got the sexiest smile.

"Why do you want to know?" he goes.

I tug on the end of the tie, and he chokes a little.

"Because you have a girlfriend, idiot."

He's not amused. "Didn't I tell you Maggie and I broke up?"

I feign surprise. "But it's been so many hours! You guys aren't back together yet? Wow, that must be some sort of record for you two."

He snickers, looks away, and then looks back at me. "You're such a bitch, you know that?"

I brush the lapels of his shirt down… and might have let my fingers linger a beat longer.

He looks down at my hands and smirks the tiniest.

Someone – Jessica – giggles beside us as she strides by. "Hey, Ed."

His eyes are on me, though. "Hey, Jess."

I shove him on the chest. "Don't stare at me like that."

He's sly. "Ditto."

"No, seriously, though." I steal his gum just as he opens the wrapper; he shakes his head, but I shrug. "Why are you dressed up?"

He opens his arms wide. "Why is it so hard to believe that I have a date?"

"Um, because you totally wouldn't go for that preppy look if you meant it."

"Mm."

The bell rings.

I take in a breath and try to think happy thoughts – yeah, I have Pete first period, so that's good.

"Bella, really. You all right?"

Ed looks a little worried, actually.

I sweep past him, but not before tugging again on his tie – just because – and he fucking laughs as if he really likes that. I bet.

"Perfectly," I tell him with a wide grin.

* * *

Emmett McCarty blatantly stares at my ass as I walk past him. "Showing some skin, huh?"

Yeah, I'm wearing a skirt for once. So what?

So I give him an exaggerated shrug. "You can look all you want, Em. Too bad you won't get to touch."

And that gets him.

I see Benji beside him – aside from being with Jasper and Ed, he's also part of the JRTOC crew – and he's kind of checking me out like he did yesterday.

Whatever.

All the boys here are after one thing – sex – and girls, too, have ulterior motives.

Sometimes, I think this school is a joke.

The _entire _populace is from either a filthy rich or a prestigious family with pretty hefty legacy.

That's not a problem, really, but it's ironic and weird that it's people like us that make stupid decisions – crazy stuff like recreational – to pretty hardcore – drug use, teenage pregnancy, and STDs.

Thing is, parents don't know. We all have the money to take care of ourselves.

I'm not really an exception, though, so maybe I shouldn't complain too much.

"I think I'm pregnant."

"No," I sigh, opening the door to the Bio class, "you're not fucking pregnant."

Rosalie's the prettiest girl I know. She's not really the type to sleep around, but when she does find herself in a bed with a guy, she forgets about the things we learned in eighth grade sex ed class.

"This isn't a fucking joke, Bella." She takes out a mirror and lipstick, and begins to paint her lips blood red. That's the cool thing about Rose; the only makeup she wears is some rouge on the mouth, and she somehow manages to look gorgeous like that. The girl has style. "My period is a week late."

"Your cycle is always all over the place, and you know it."

"But I swear to God…" She sits down and bounces her knee. She actually looks pretty scared. "Paul swears we used a condom, but damn, I can't trust him."

"It'll be all right, hussie." I pause and smile, perhaps a little lewdly. "Well, fuck that. Who cares? He's going to be the fourth generation doctor in the family… You know that, right?"

She knocks her elbow against my shoulder, sending me reeling, and we're laughing a little.

"You're so full of shit, Bella!"

"I know."

This is our typical pregnancy scare.

We take turns every few months; Rose is much better than I am though – better at convincing that a guy's sperm hasn't fertilized my egg, I mean.

I swear; we should just be on the damn pill.

"So, guess what?"

"What?"

"I was talking to Benji just now."

"Cool."

She gives me a look.

"What?" I scowl. "What am I supposed to say to that?"

"He wants you back."

"Yeah?" I answer, but this time I'm too busy staring at Pete as he walks in the classroom. His smile is dazzling, goodness.

Rose sighs all dreamy. "Snap out of it. You're never going to get to fuck Mr. Hyde."

"It's not like that!"

She snorts. "Right. You totally want to fuck him."

* * *

Today's Bio class was pretty embarrassing.

Pete, distracted by Jessica and Lauren like always, started to talk about testicle mumps and how the disease could cause the degeneration of guy parts.

Of course I had to blurt out, "Is that a bad thing?"

Pete bit his lip – to not to smile, I think – and calmly told me yes.

Class started laughing.

Rose groaned.

Yeah, embarrassing.

"He kind of looked at you like you were cute, though. That's a good thing," Rose tells me, trying to make me feel better.

For once, it's not working.

"He probably thinks I'm an idiot –"

"– but not a virgin."

"Rose!" I hiss.

"What? You got all flustered and started talking about cock, and did you see his face? A virgin does not know the size of a set of balls of an average American male, but you did. Oh, if he didn't know before, he knows now."

Yeah, that too. Again, embarrassing.

"Maybe you will get to fuck him after all…" Smirking, Rose blows me a kiss in goodbye and begins to head off to the other building. "Love ya."

"Love you too," I mumble and smile. That's Rose.

* * *

I think I just bombed my interview.

Damn it. There goes my chance to impress mom.

It's lunch, and in the deserted hall, I recognize a face. It's obvious that he's been searching for me – with the way his focused gaze follows me.

Rose never lies. She's always right too.

Benji uncrosses his ankles and pops his body off the wall.

The he's following me.

Before long, he catches up and does this subtle thing with his hand that it's riding low in the area between my lower back and butt.

I give his hand, then his face, a look.

I thought I made it clear yesterday; plus I'm not in the mood for this.

"My parents won't be home tonight," he whispers close in my ear, and then kind of studies our surroundings as if he's afraid that someone – Jasper – might be around to hear.

"Benji." I push his arm down, gently but firmly. "I'm not interested anymore. I told you this already."

"But no one fucks like you do, I swear."

I sigh. "_You_ broke up with _me._"

"That's only because your brother was starting to notice something was up."

I smirk down at his pants. "Like your dick?"

"Cute."

"Uh huh." I give him a nasty kiss on the neck, sucking hard and loud, and he groans like he's inside me already.

I'm just joking around, but he takes the kiss too seriously because the next thing I know, he goes for my lips.

"And no one kisses like you do," he tells me.

I bend at the waist.

He frowns. "God, Bella, don't fucking tease me."

"And you're just horny and looking for an easy lay."

"Bella," he groans.

"You're such a hornball." If only Jasper knew.

"Just for you, babe."

It's such a line.

"'Kay, fine, I'll be there," I sigh. "But if you don't have condoms like last time, you're not getting any, buddy."

The hornball smirks. "I knew you'd come around."

I attempt a smile. "Only because you look hot in that uniform."

He looks down at his JROTC uniform then at my face. He bites his lip and cocks his head to the side, and he's so close.

"You were totally fucking with me yesterday at your house," he whispers, eyes only on my mouth. "And this morning with McCarty."

"I know," I whisper back.

And I let him kiss me.

Benji's a kisser.

He's pretty fantastic.

He's also harmless, but I kind of hate him because he ignores me at school.

But then he does _this_ when we're alone: solicit.

"God, I missed you," he sighs.

You mean my body, asshole.

I shove his chest.

He's backing away, wiping the remnant of my cherry lip-gloss off his lips and tasting it on his thumb.

He looks fucking smug, but I don't care – as long as mom and Jasper don't find out.

He likes to fuck with me, but what can I say – I like to fuck with him too.

And he might tell his friends that I'm easy, but, well, I tell mine that he's easy too.

* * *

"Why am I not surprised that it's you?" I cross my arms and rest myself against the doorway because this is pretty funny. "Is this going to become a regular thing, Edward?"

"Maybe."

It's rainy outside, and he's wet.

"Why are you here?" I laugh as I say it.

"Dad's over in Virginia for last-minute campaigning, and Mom's out getting her dress tailored."

Really wet.

I snort. "And so what? You were feeling lonely? Oh, right, you don't have a girlfriend anymore. I totally forgot."

"Hey, stop bringing her up."

"Aw, no one wants to play with the Senator's son."

"That's just wrong on so many levels."

"Pervert."

"That I am."

His hair is sexier when it's dark and wet like that.

I shake my head, smirking. "Dude, there's thing called an umbrella."

"There's also a thing called hospitality." He winks as a raindrop reaches his eye. "Are you going to let me in or what?"

I finally gesture him in, and he closes the door behind us.

"Is anyone home?" he asks, looking around. "Jasper?"

"Nah, it's just me." I stare at his nipples, because they're now visible under his soaked pink shirt, and then at his face. "Wait, what happened to the hot date?"

"She bailed. She had to go to a birthday party."

I unintentionally laugh. "What?"

"My little sister."

Little sister?

Now I get it.

"Ah, the infamous little Tanya Cullen!"

"Yes, the infamous little princess." His smile says it all; it's not exactly a secret that he's a total dummy when it comes down to his two-year-old baby sister.

After I get him a towel, I head into the kitchen and go back to eating my early dinner.

Ed decides to drop in.

"Ah," he says, glancing at my chicken alfredo, "that explains why you looked like you just gave someone a blowjob."

I chew a little self-consciously. "What the fuck?"

He shakes his head and wipes a smidgen of cream sauce off the corner of my lips. He licks it.

Damn. He does it better than Benji.

But I narrow my eyes. "That's gross."

Then he laughs. "And why are you eating pasta with chopsticks?"

"'Cause all the forks are in the sink, and I'm too lazy to wash 'em."

He's standing across from me now, still in his soaking wet, hot boy glory.

Jessica's right. He has gorgeous eyes.

Looking away, I purse my lips and push my dish away. "Look, I'm going out, actually. If you want to hang around, sure, knock yourself out. Jasper should be back in half an hour; he's out doing –"

"– Alice Brandon."

I give him a funny look. "I was about to say something else."

He shrugs. "We both know what he's doing. Or should we say whom?"

"Disgusting. I'd rather not know," I sigh. "Well, hey, I'm really going to go now." I wink. "_I _actually have a legit date."

He watches me in amusement as I dump the dish in the sink. "With who? Benji?"

I smirk; I _knew _it. I _knew _that Edward knew this all along.

"You could be banging someone much better, Bella."

I burst out laughing and turn, hands on the ledge behind me. "Ed, he's your best friend."

"I know." He shrugs. "I'm just sayin'."

"Mm. Well, gotta run." I grab for my purse. "Are my lips clean this time?"

He stares at my mouth way too long. "Uh huh."

Smiling, I rush off. Then I stop. "You know, Jasper doesn't know anything about me and Benji and stuff. You're not going to tell him, are you?"

"You kidding me?"

I scrunch my nose, smiling again. "Thanks, Edward."

He waves me off. "Have fun."

* * *

I'm not having much fun.

Benji's being an asshole.

"I don't do oral," I practically yell. "You know that!"

"Come on. Just once?"

I sigh and look down at his groin.

Sometimes, I hate being a teenager… or being _with_ a teenager. How is it possible that he's hard again when he's just come literally five minutes ago?

And he knows that I never do oral on someone. I'm always on the receiving side.

Benji hates it; he's a guy, after all.

So maybe I'm being the asshole.

So I kiss him, because how else can you make a horny guy feel better? Kiss him better and all, right?

I let his tongue in my mouth and suck on it as hard as I can.

"If you'd just do that on my dick," he whispers.

"Nice try." I catch his lips and bite.

He's now frantically sucking at my neck. "Love it when you do that. Now go and spread your legs like a good girl."

I roll my eyes. He's kind of kinky; thank God he hasn't asked for anal or anything crazy like that.

"Benji," I say breathlessly. "You owe me the toll fee, by the way."

His laugh is light in my ear. "I got you."

Yeah, even though Benji goes to school in D.C. – with Jasper, Edward, and me – his home is in Virginia. He drives over state borders daily.

And I know that he has a girlfriend here – here as in Virginia – right now.

I also know that he was two-timing her and me a few months ago, when he and I were dating behind my brother's back.

I moan when he pushes through and starts fucking me.

I know he's using my body, but unlike some people, at least he knows how to get me off.

"Benji," I whisper when he pins my hands down beside my head to drive into me better.

He languidly kisses my cheek. "What's up, baby?"

I sigh. "Get your hands off me."

But he presses my wrists farther into his bed; I use all my energy flip over so I'm on top.

I hate it when he – or any other guy, for that matter – tries to pin me down like that.

"I always forget that my baby likes to take control," Benji muses as I ride him.

I grin and swivel my hips, and it's not long before he's grunting my name.

See? He's too easy.

* * *

**A/N: **So… this Bella is a bit… promiscuous? Heh. I like her, though. And she has her secrets, faults, and scars – which you'll learn as the story progresses.

Now, the question is: Do _you _find her likable? Sort of? No?

Well, now, does anyone want to make a banner for this story? :-)

Sarah


	4. Chapter 3

**THREE**

* * *

There's only a few minutes left till the first bell rings, and I'm looking at the school board. Taped on it is the roster of new inductees to National Honor Society.

I'm speechless… because I made it.

For a moment I think about mom's influence on the decision, but mom hardly cares to put in any effort to sell out the sponsor.

"Ah, shit," Rose drawls coyly, nudging me again and again.

"Hell yes," Ed hoots at the top of his lungs. "Honor student right here!"

"Wow! Congrats, Bella!"

"'Gratulations, Swan!"

"Wow, that's amazing, Bella!"

I hear all these nice compliments from around me, and I mumble back a thanks to each one. Then when I find the chance, I gut Ed in the stomach. His stomach is hard as rock, though, so I only hurt myself.

_Nice. _The pervert in me grins, and I poke his stomach.

He grabs my wrist just as I try to do it the third time, and we end up awkwardly hugging each other because he's shying away and I'm not.

"What are you doing?" he laughs.

Just as I'm about to tease him, he takes a step away. Benji appears from beside us, followed by Jasper.

Ed pats me on the waist. I stick my tongue out at him.

From across me, Benji winks. I wink back; he hides a smile with the back of his hand, eyes averted to the ground.

And Jasper… he's clueless.

I sigh. Why do both of my brother's best friends have to be so cute?

* * *

Benji doesn't object – no, far from it – when I push him into the backseats of my car after second period.

We hear the tardy bell but hardly react to it.

Kissing me back, in between moans, he says, "Your car's so fucking tiny for this."

"I know. I'm getting a new car." My breath picks up as his finger finds my pussy.

"That's good." He leaves a wet kiss on my bare breast. "Goddamn. You're so wet, and I've barely touched you."

"I was wet all first period."

He snickers. "Such a little slut."

I stop kissing him. "If you want me to make you feel good, then stop calling me that."

Benji brushes the hair off my face. "'Kay."

He dives forward, eager to kiss me again, but I twist away.

His finger traces my jutting bottom lip. "What's wrong, baby?"

I don't answer.

He sighs and looks me in the eye. "What, Bella?"

"Apologize."

He smirks, eyes droopy, and pecks me. "Sorry, babe."

I frown.

"What? I said I'm sorry."

I quietly stare. His chest is flexing and hard because he's trying to hold his weight off me; it's like a metal surface wrapped up in a soft cushion. His neck is slightly sweaty, tastes salty under my tongue, and he's got sexy abs. He's some shades tanner than I am, and I've never seen prettier eyes on anyone.

"Fine," I sigh and straddle him, to which he groans in satisfaction and starts rubbing himself all over me.

"Condom?" he whispers.

"The glove compartment."

It's only a matter of time before we're naked and sweating and fogging up the windows and reeking of sex.

And it feels good when I come.

* * *

"Hey, girl! What are you going to wear tomorrow? For the induction ceremony?"

"Bella, isn't your birthday, like, really soon?"

"What are you going to do for your birthday?"

I wish they would all just shut up. I feel dizzy, nauseated even.

"Hey, Bella." Benji gives me a meaningful, smirking look as he sits down across from me; he's the last to join our lunch group.

Rosalie kicks me from under the table, and I'm not surprised. The girl has a sixth sense, I swear. She's going to be pissed that I haven't told her about what happened last night – or earlier today, for that matter.

So I keep a straight face. "Hi, Benji."

His eyes never move away from me; he's undressing me with those eyes, I swear. "Do anything fun last night?"

"Uh huh." I stick a baby carrot in my mouth and suck. He groans. "Earlier today too."

His eyes darken – glaze over.

I smile sweetly. "You?"

He just laughs and shakes his head.

I hum, nonchalant, but I know he loves that shit. He loves the fact that I'm supposed to be off-limits and that all of this is a secret. I think he gets off it sometimes.

From beside me, Edward is having a hard time suppressing a smile. He masks the chuckle with a cough and leans in my ear. "You are…"

"I'm what?" I whisper back, grinning wider and wider.

He just inhales and exhales loudly through his nose. "No words."

Laughing, I nudge him. "What, tell me!"

He's laughing too, back to talking low in my ear; I can feel his breath. "I think you're enjoying the suspense a bit too much."

I study Jasper, who's sitting across from me, but he barely notices because he obviously can't keep his eyes off Alice Brandon on the other side of the room. God knows what he sees in that girl; she's such a brat.

"It's hardly suspenseful." I raise my voice. "Hey, Jas!"

No response.

"Deaf," I say. "See?"

"I guess for the moment…"

"_Bella_."

"Yes, Lauren?" I sigh, looking at her.

"You should totally throw a pool party."

"For what?"

"For your birthday, silly."

Rosalie snorts impolitely, twirling a French fry in between her fingers, and Lauren glares.

"It's _Bella's _birthday party, honey," Rose points out in a slow drawl, "not yours."

Lauren rolls her eyes, annoyed. "So?"

"Well…" I say pensively. "Pool party works as long as you bring your own booze."

The table groans.

"What?" I snap. "I'm turning seventeen, not twenty-one. Besides, my mom would kill me."

"What about mom?" Jasper says suddenly.

Benji lifts an eyebrow. "You gonna invite me, Bella?"

Rose's eyes are flying between us two.

"Yeah," I breathe and look at Ed. "You too."

Ed tips an imaginary hat. "I'm honored, birthday girl."

* * *

I make it back home around midnight, and mom's not pleased. She never shouts, though.

She has reading glasses on, a fashion magazine sitting on her thighs, and is sipping her night tea by our tea table. "You're late."

I quietly slip into my indoor slippers. "Things came up."

"What things?"

"Just things."

She simply goes back to reading, but the air of disapproval is ridiculously obvious.

Jasper greets me at the foyer, coffee in hand and glasses on his nose.

I smirk a little. "Pulling an all-nighter, bro?"

"You know it." He bends his back to the side, stretching. "What were you doing so late?"

Your best friend. "Just. I don't know."

"Bella, you must be tired. You should go to bed," mom cuts in, voice sharp.

"Okay," I reply.

Jasper watches mom and me over the rim of his mug, knowing.

He follows me up the stairs and tickles my side.

I giggle, squirming. "Stop!"

He bumps his elbow to mine. "Sneak into my room later, if you want to."

"Why," I sigh, "you need someone to write the essay for you?"

He shrugs, but again, knows.

Sometimes, I think he's sorry that he gets all the attention.

Good.

"Okay. See you in fifteen," I tell him.

* * *

"Hey, daddy," I whisper into the phone, "did I wake you?"

"No, sweetie," he groans. There's shuffling. "I was just taking a nap."

Nap?

I check the time; it's one in the morning. I hope Jasper hasn't fallen asleep yet.

"How's business going?" I ask.

"'s fine."

He's short with me. He must be tired.

"Well, I just wanted to ask if I can have some friends over for my birthday."

"Whatever you want. Do you need a caterer? Party planner?"

Money, money, money. "Nah, I think I can handle it. I just wanted permission; mom doesn't want to talk about it, I think."

"I see, I see. Well, you have my approval. Have fun."

I smile, a little sleepy. "Thanks."

"You'll have your car by the time I come back."

Money, money, money. "Thank you."

"It's red."

I hate red. "My favorite color."

"I know. Now I have to go back to work."

"Right. Okay, bye."

"Bye, sleep tight."

"Wait, dad?"

"Hmm?"

I look down. "Miss you."

He chuckles. "Miss you too."

"Okay, bye."

I speak last.

He hangs up first.

* * *

Jasper can't make it to the induction ceremony because Alice doesn't want to go and would rather be somewhere else.

I seriously have no idea how she manages to control him like that; just a little shake of her head and a meek pout work miracles for her, apparently, because Jasper was pretty set on coming before she went all whiny.

And I don't even bother to ask mom; she won't go, I know.

"You're early," I say breathlessly, opening the front door just as I finish hooking in my formal stud earring. I scan the boy in front of me from head to toe: two buttons of his white dress shirt undone, sleeves rolled up, and the bottom hem tucked under the belt and his dark slacks. "And all decked out, I see."

Ed crosses his arms. The arms flex, goodness. "Ready to go?"

"Um," I laugh, "not even close."

His eyes scan my body this time. "Ah, you're not dressed. Sweats, really?"

"But better than lingerie, right?" I whisper-tease, looking over my shoulder to check our privacy.

He puts on a straight face. "Hardly. I'm kind of disappointed that you're wearing clothes, to be honest."

I sigh, dreamy, and let him in. He smells amazing, like cologne and fresh laundry.

"Oh, Edward, you're such a sweetheart for offering to drive Bella to the ceremony. I really appreciate this."

"My pleasure, Ms. Swan." His gaze, on my face, warms. "I'll drive her back home safely."

Mom puts on a sweet smile, her blood red lips spreading to show her pearly whites. "Bella, don't keep Edward waiting."

"I know." I rush up the stairs.

* * *

I'm flattening my favorite deep violet dress over my stomach by the time I'm back downstairs, and mom is definitely flirting with Edward.

I can't believe Edward's flirting back, but he's Edward; he flirts with everyone because that's what he does.

I grab an apple, careful not to mess up my glossed mouth, and stay put against the wall.

Edward thrusts his hands in his back pockets, rocking on his feet, and laughs at what mom just said. He's good with the eye-contact too, all smoldering and attentive; I wonder if his dad taught him that as part of training or something. Being the flirt he is, he's crinkling his eyes and squaring his shoulders as he does, and it makes me gag and roll my eyes.

And mom's got to stop grabbing her student's biceps like that.

"_Ooo_kay," I interrupt, nodding slowly, "let's go."

Mom only now notices my presence and grins up at her favorite student. "I guess I'll see you at school, then."

Edward offers me an arm, and I grab it in earnest with both my hands.

"Oh, and Bella?" mom calls me last-minute. "You're going to have to push that birthday party back a day. We have family visiting that night."

_Family._ I feel chills down my spine. "Which one?"

She waves me off, looking at me from under her fake lashes. "Our relatives in California, who else?"

Mom and I stare each other down, long and hard, and my hand around Ed's arm shakes and relaxes.

"Why are they coming here?" I whisper because that's all I can do.

"I invited. We couldn't make it to Jared's wedding." Mom daintily sits herself down on the couch, crossing her legs. Her raised eyebrow is daring me. "We have to congratulate him some way."

"But I don't want them to come," I whisper again.

Her gaze hardens. "You have no say."

"Mom! You never told me!"

"Shush." Her glare is frightening. "You two are going to be late. On you go."

"Mom," I say again. I'm angrier as I realize that she's bringing this subject up now when we have an audience so I won't go screaming.

Her voice drops. "Is there a problem, Isabella Marie?"

My stomach turns, and I'm too terrified and mad to say anything.

"Good." She hum-sighs. "Jared and Kim are expecting a child, by the way. She's six weeks in. Isn't that great?"

Sick to the stomach, I grab Ed by the wrist and haul him to the driveway.

* * *

"Cheese!"

Snap.

I think the camera flash just blinded me.

Annoyed, I shrug out of Edward's arm. "I didn't take you as a selfie person."

He checks the preview on his camera, nodding with a little smirk. "It's an important day."

"Doesn't mean you have to document it." My heart beats pretty fast, because I'm still furious with mom.

He shows me the picture. I know I'm not terribly photogenic, so I don't care that I don't look spectacular. He looks perfect, though. When is he _not _perfect?

"Besides," I sigh again, "how is this important? It's not like _you're_ getting inducted, Mr. NHS President."

"This isn't for me, silly. It's for you." He pinches both my cheeks upward. "And come on. Smile, won't ya?"

"Sorry. Smiling takes a lot of energy."

"Maybe, but a lot less than frowning." He watches me in his clever way. "It's not going to be that bad – your relatives visiting. It's just a day. You can still throw a party afterward."

"This isn't about my birthday –" I shake my head, impatient. "Never mind – just – God, I need a drink."

"Mr. Cullen! I need you here!" the National Honor Society sponsor shouts from the stage. "How do we set up these candles?"

Ed pats my shoulder. "I'll send you the picture." He leans close, his cheek brushing against mine as he whispers. "We can go find some alcohol after this if you're still up for it by then. Let me know."

And he's off.

* * *

I'm waiting in Ed's car when he returns, and he still smells so good, bringing in a cold breeze with him; he's snuck two bottles of wine.

"Chardonnay, really? You're so fucking cheap," I accuse lightly.

"I shoplifted for you. My dad's reputation could be at stake." He leans over my legs and pulls out the opener from his glove compartment, expertly popping open the cork. "That should mean something."

I'm laughing again. "Who keeps a corkscrew in a car? Only you, I swear."

"Sorry, but no wine glasses." He tosses his head back and gobbles down some of the white wine; his Adam's apple bobs with each swallow, and it's sexy as hell. "Here ya go."

I follow his example. I love the sweet taste.

"So."

"So, what?" I say.

"What was up with you and your mom back at home?"

"None of your business."

"I guess it's sensitive subject." He smirks. "All right, then. I never asked."

* * *

Two bottles of Chardonnay on our way back home, and I'm tipsy as hell – even though I'm safely seated in the car – and God, I really have to pee.

"You look like you really need to use the restroom." He scowls as I tighten my thighs together, and his grey eyes widen. "Fuck, you really do, don't you?"

"Well, yes. Obviously."

Then he's laughing, which is not that surprising. Ed tends to get slightly giggly when he gets drunk, and it's kind of cute because his right eye crinkles more than his left one when he's laughing hard.

I slap his shoulder when he makes the sound of water running with his puckered mouth.

"Stop!" I whine. "You really think this is funny?"

"Well."

"Never mind. You don't have to tell me," I say, still watching him. "It's not that hard to tell. Did you know your right eye crinkles more than your left when you laugh? Well, specifically when you're laughing at something you find genuinely funny. I can always tell whether or not you're faking it. When you fake it, both of your eyes crinkle evenly."

"Really?" He pops down the visor and inspects his handsome face. "I didn't know I do that."

"Eyes on the road!" I shout, hand shooting out to the wheel.

He grabs it just in time. "Shit, that's not good."

"Yeah, please don't kill me."

"No, I meant it sucks that people can read me that easily."

"Oh. I don't think a lot of people know about that uneven eye-smile thing."

"You do."

"Well, that's only because I've known you since we were kids."

"True."

I roll down the windows because it's getting warmer in the car. A draft of lukewarm air rolls in, and Ed leans to his side of the car, lazy and mussing up his hair.

"Remember when I took you to Homecoming your freshman year?"

I'm kind of caught off guard. "I also remember getting in a car accident on our way there."

He's laughing again. "Give me a break. I just got my permit then."

"Yeah." I think. "Remember you took me out on a date because my mom forced you to?"

"I wouldn't say forced, but yes, I remember." He thinks, too. "Remember when you stepped on my foot?"

"No way. What? Really?"

"Really," he smirks.

"When did I ever step on your foot?"

He keeps smirking.

I remember a lot of things, actually. I remember when Ed was a few inches shorter than me. He never had serious acne or anything, but he had a rounder face back in middle school and the awkward girl-guy voice.

Now he's eighteen and hot as fuck; he's tan with freckled shoulders, a movie star profile, muscled arms, and a sprinkle of chest hair that just barely peeks out of that dress shirt.

I quickly look off to the window, narrowly stopping myself from going on and begin talking about his legs and groin.

"I can't believe I'm drunk off a Chardonnay," I groan.

"I kind of am too," he admits.

I'm kind of relieved that he's admitting, because he's been eyeing me for a while too.

Yeah, must be the alcohol.

* * *

I want to throw up all over again when Ed parks in front of my townhouse.

"This is you," he tells me when I don't move.

He's not the type to force me out, so he waits patiently, relaxing and softly tapping a finger on his belt buckle.

His eyes are on me. "You look gorgeous tonight – I don't think I told you that, or did I?"

I look at him funny. "You, mister, are clearly drunk."

He sits up a little. "Bella, I have a favor to ask of you."

"Yeah?"

"Assuming my dad gets elected again, I would like it if you could be my date to the celebratory party. Will you?"

Wow. He and Maggie must be really done.

"Yeah, sure, I guess." I shrug. "I'd love to. Who am I to refuse free food?"

He snickers politely. Lazy, he continues to play with his belt, now with the strap too. Whether he's doing subconsciously or consciously, I don't know.

I groan finally. "Can you stop that?"

"Stop what?"

"Playing with your belt. It's driving me crazy."

His fingers freeze, and there's a hint of a smirk in his voice. "Okay."

I curse under my breath as I reach for my seatbelt, and then I'm cursing the alcohol. I don't know exactly what I'm saying, but I don't really care because I'm just plain bothered right now.

I'm surprised when he tilts me to him by the shoulder, and he's coming in, colliding him to me and jolting me into a kiss. It's so sudden and random – and so strong of a starting kiss – that I freeze up.

Then I melt into his touch. His lips are so smooth, and the way they move is so suave and confident and just perfect.

Just as he cups my chin, I push his chest. "What the fuck was that?"

His lips are cherry red, and his eyes go wide. "Shit."

"Holy shit," I echo him in a whisper.

I'm fumbling like crazy as I try to get the door.

"I got it, I got it," he says, frantic, under his breath as he pops it open for me.

All I can do is ignore him – and trip on my own foot as I slam the door behind me, but I'm not quite sure if I'm angry. But I want to say something, so I latch an arm on the still-opened window just in time to catch him checking me out. I suddenly forget what I was going to say.

Since when was Edward Cullen attracted to me like that?

What's more important, since when was _I _ever attracted to him like that? Because this time, it's _him_ catching me staring at his lips.

Now I'm really noticing that he has those stunning glass-marble eyes, wide-angular shoulders that are probably fantastic for me to hold onto, lips to die for, and – he's one of few guys who's actually taller than me. But since _when _was he like that?

I'm kind of feeling fucked right now, because my God, he _is _gorgeous.

I knew that but I didn't _know _that. Fuck.

Flustered and thoroughly mind-fucked by this stupidest revelation, I turn away, only to turn back. The left corner of his mouth is slightly tipped upward in a small smirk when I plunge through the window and pull him into a second kiss.

He inhales when our mouths merge. I can feel his neck muscles tighten when I touch him there.

And the moment our tongues touch, we moan.

He's so good at this, and we kiss and kiss, our lips making sucking and popping noises. I'm sucking on his tongue, and I'm sure he's hard and I'm wet. I think both of us know, deep down, that we're in deep shit. I wait for him to stop me – then again, I think he's waiting for me to do the same.

"Get back in the car," he commands me.

And I do, and I'm climbing over his lap – and damn, I'm right because he's hard as rock; I'm so fucking sensitive, too, because my bladder's about to explode.

He sweeps my hair off my shoulders and swirls his tongue down my neck. He tells me that he's wanted to do that since, well . . . Verbatim: "Since, fuck, I don't even know."

I guess I'm not alone in this revelation.

"Shit, shit, shit," I say again, because it feels so good but I'm kind of getting scared now.

"I know."

"God." I grind into him. He guides my hips. "What the fuck are we doing?"

"I don't know."

_I know. I don't know. The fuck?_

But he shuts me up with his mouth, and I let him.

Yeah, we're in some deep, deep shit, and I don't even know how it happened.

* * *

**A/N:** I know it's been a while. So did you like it? Hate it? Let me know!

Sarah


End file.
